Oww! My butt hurts!

So yesterday my group of friends and I decided we wanted to go biking in Deer Valley. We could buy a lift pass and ride up and down the mountain all day, plus it’s been rated some of the best mountain biking in the nation.

We were jazzed, it was a beautiful clear day, and a perfect 70 degrees! We got up there, bought our lift tickets, and headed up the mountain to rip up the terrain.

It was awesome! The trails were easily marked, the air was cool, and we all had a blast. We rode all day, and never had to ride uphill, because the lift did all the work for us.

By the end of the day I had decided that I NEED a new bike, the one I got for my 12th birthday just isn’t cutting it anymore. A ridged frame made all my guy friends think I was “really hardcore” because they all admitted they couldn’t have biked the mountain without their shocks.

And today I barley can move. My hands hurt, my butt really hurts and my legs are so sore! But I’m not the only one, all the guys can’t move either!

Deer Creek

My house on Deer Creek is beautiful, a two story and a full basement. There are seven bedrooms, four baths, a huge living room, sun room, and dining room. Also there’s a large kitchen, beautiful front port, gorgeous patio, and a trampoline in back where E and I fell in love.

I remember the first time I saw this house, I was 12 and my brother B and I drove up in our realtor’s sports car, after getting a Slurpy and 7-11. I loved the house, even when I first saw it. It was huge (at least that’s what I thought when I was 12), and very beautiful.

We bought the house, and moved in quickly. I chose a beautiful upstairs room with three windows, more windows than any other room. It was always light and warm in that room. I picked a blue and white stripped wallpaper and my mom, dad, and I fixed it up, along with decorating the rest of the house.

The house grew and changed with us. We redecorated, switched rooms around, and redid the entire master bathroom. The house was more beautiful than ever. My parents always dreamed about having climbing roses on the front of the house, so one summer we reworked all of the gardens, and when we were done, the house shone.

At Christmas B and I always loved to decorate the front of the house with lights. My dad let us be in charge and we always did as we wished. I remember one year, when I must have been 14 and B 10, when we edged all the windows and doors in lights. We spend hours on it, and it's one of my favorite Christmas memories.

When I was 15 I wanted a more “grown up” room, so my parents helped me move to the basement. We converted the huge playroom into my bedroom and painted the entire thing in one weekend. I choose to have the walls a yummy butter yellow, the ceiling blue, and all the woodwork white. It was spectacular, and huge!

Christmases and Thanksgivings came and went. My siblings grew up, M and Ch went from tiny children to preteens. I was a senior in high school before I ever got a boyfriend, (E) and we fell in love at the house, on the trampoline in the backyard.

E and I spent every summer night on the trampoline, and really got to know each other.

The next fall I left for college, but Deer Creek was still home. I still ate Sunday dinners with my family, and still had my room. After I moved out of the dorms I moved back home, and it was still the same beautiful house that seemed so big to me when I was 12.

Last Christmas was a tense one. My mom and dad weren’t doing well, but I would have never guessed it was my last Christmas at the house. New Years came and went, and when I made my predictions for the next year, I predicted that my parents wouldn’t stay together.

My mom moved out in May and never seemed to look back. My dad held onto the house, but decided in the last month that he needed to sell it. He’s completely moved out, and B is finishing moving out today.

The house will be painted and scrubbed, and then sold. The house will not be ours anymore. I will never have my family under one roof ever again, and I will never have Christmas as I did my entire life ever again.

E and I went up to the house last night to say goodbye. It is hard to say goodbye to a house you love. I’ve had many wonderful memories there, and grew from a child to a woman in the house. I had my first kiss on the front porch, and Ch spoke his first word inside its walls.

I walked all around and said goodbye to each and every room. I went into “stinky storage” and said goodbye to our storage room with the silly name. I went up to my old bedroom and looked around at a room I hardly recognized anymore. I said goodbye to the graves of our family pets Smudge and Henry. And then before I left I laid down on the trampoline with E to look at the summer sky one last time and I cried.

I cried for my family, who will never be a “family” again. I cried for my kitty Boo who had died so innocently in the dryer less six months before. I cried for my siblings who will never have a “perfect” childhood like I did, and I cried for my house, which will never be mine again. And I cried for all the loss I’ve experienced this past year.

Things in life-

They are still stressful. My dad is doing cuzy cuzy (so-so in Italian). He has his ups and downs, but he has moved out of the house. I can’t believe the house I called home will belong to someone else soon. I moved into that house when I was 12. I have a lot of wonderful memories there.

My Grandpa is doing okay also. Last week they had to cut out a day of his chemo because his kidneys were acting up. But by the end of the week he was in good sprits and feeling a lot better (and more awake than he’s felt in a month).

My brother is stressed about everything going on, so I hope to see him tonight and just enjoy our time together. He moved into that house when he was 8, so it’s been his home almost his entire life. Plus, B is never hip to change, and all this change at once is really taking a toll.

Other than that I am fine! I hope that sounded sarcastic enough. I’m having a really hard time with this stress. This morning I woke up with a feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach, and I just felt pretty depressed about everything going on.

E and I went to the farmhouse this weekend, and instead of enjoying myself like I usually do, I worried a lot about my dad.

One thing that I am really happy about is my upcoming honeymoon in Italy! We leave on September 13th for NYC, and then leave the 14th for Venice. We’ll spend 16 days exploring everything Italian (especially the food).

E and I have been listening to “Learn Italian” on our iPods, and we are getting to be cuzy cuzy. I know how to count to 6, say hello, and a few other small things. I want to learn “I love you more than anything” and “the food was delicious”, both would sound so cool in Italian!

What a summer

I swear, just when things feel like they are setting down, and I can finally relax, things ramp up again. Just last night as I was staring at my computer monitor I realized that this summer has been really tough.

Just in the last week a lot has happened, here is a quick list:
1. My dad went from being really depressed to motivated to sell the house literally overnight. He put it on the market, found a new one, and began to pack. It is all moving really quickly, and I’m going to miss what I’ve called “home” for the last 13 years. I was thinking the other day that I’ll never climb the tree out front, sleep on the tramp under the starts out back, or have Christmases in the family room again.

2. My mom is longing for someone special more than ever. She feels like she has found that person, but many people (including E) disagree with her decision. I am torn, I really want her to be happy, but it will be a really difficult choice for her because some people will never accept her choice, and she will loose even more people in her life. This saddens me a great deal.

3. My brother went into surgery after breaking his foot in 6 places. They say he’ll always have pain there, and it will never be as good as new. The doctors put a 2” screw in there to hold together a shattered bone. After the surgery mom wanted to go up to my Dad’s and see Ch, but my dad had a date over- and it wasn’t just a date, it was my mom’s best friend for 20 years that is now getting close to my dad (they are not best friends anymore). Needless to say, my mom was pissed and Ch felt really uncomfortable.

4. My grandpa is getting more and more tired. His chemo and radiation are going well, and he isn’t nauseous or anything, but he barley can stay awake for more than two hours at a time. Because of it, my grandma is really lonely and hoping for a speedy recovery.

5. My other brother is really having a hard time with my dad’s decision to sell the house. He doesn’t want to move out yet, and he doesn’t want to move to the new place. He is really having a hard time with the decision.

6. Then to get away from it all E and I went down to the farmhouse this last weekend and we had a problem with his sister. She and I both love American Girl items (dolls stuff) and we found a piece used in a little shop down there. I spotted it first, and therefore bought it. She wasn’t happy with me and therefore wasn’t happy for most of the weekend. The stress really built up, and I felt really hurt.

7. Another thing that I am hurt over is that two of my four (and only) girlfriends were unable to make my wedding. I'm not hurt about that, more that I haven't even heard from them for months. I understand that they each have busy lives, but I didn't get a card, a phone call, nada. I guess friends come and go, my mom sure knows that...

So I hope things get back into the groove, because all this stress is taking a toll.

On a good note, I took some really cute pictures of my dolls down at the farmhouse. Here is my favorite of Rachel and Molly: