Cervix and I decided to make a truce

I'm back at the hospital. Wow, what a crazy 12 hours it has been since I last updated, feels like a lifetime ago.

E and I grabbed burgers for dinner and headed home to watch an episode of Lost. While watching, contractions started again, and so I decided to start timing. They were somewhat intense, but not horrible. By the end of the show I would have to consciously breathe through them and walk while the peak of the contraction hit. They were timing 6-9 minutes apart and at this point the morphine from earlier had worn off, and I could feel that they were growing in intensity.

I wanted to try to sleep but after doing our bathroom routine I realized there was no way I could sleep through one of these. I asked E if he would mind sleeping in the guest room (this is the first time I've asked him to sleep apart from me the entire pregnancy!) and told him to get some rest. I then walked and tried to deal with the contractions the best I could. They were getting stronger and stronger, but not getting closer together.

I was exhausted from the day's events, but each time I tried to lie down I would have to pull myself out of bed, quite painfully, to walk through the contraction. I then decided to take a hot bath, thinking that might slow them. Instead they continued to intensify.

By the time I was out of the tub, I was having horrible pain with each contraction, and the pain would not ever completely go away between contractions. I was walking and breathing, and trying to stay calm. I needed the contractions to get closer together before we headed to the hospital a second time, and they were still timing six minutes apart.

After two hours of this, I woke E. I told him I didn't care that the contractions were not five minutes apart or less, I needed to get an epidural, now. I told him he needed to get up and drive me to the hospital, asap.

I've always thought I had a high tolerance for pain, but I had never ever felt something like this before. I stumbled out to the car and E drove quietly and quickly, not wanting to upset me. I huffed and puffed through the contractions, cried out, and tried to focus. They felt like menstrual cramps from hell.

Once we finally pulled up to the hospital doors the pain was so intense the tears started to come. I barley could stand, sit, walk, move, or think. Never ever had I been in so much pain. I walked into the labor and delivery unit in a daze, signing all the paperwork to allow me a room.

Once they placed me in a room I started to pace, in more pain then I'd ever dealt with. E was trying to be so kind and wonderful, not sure how to help me. I told him not to dare touch me, so he just sat down in defeat and said "ok".

Finally the nurse arrived and I told her I needed an epidural, that I had no idea how some woman did this naturally. She checked me over and decided to admit me (yea!) and then called for the anesthesiologist. He arrived and asked me to curl into a little ball and hold really still. I was doing okay until another contraction started, where I had to use all the focus in the world to stop from crying out and writhing in pain.

But, as soon as the epidural was placed my entire world shifted. I was able to breathe again, able to see, and most importantly, able to rest. The nurse helped E make up a bed in the room and I we both were able to sleep from 2:30 am to around six am.

When morning arrived I found out that I had dilated more (up to six centimeters) and that they were guessing that Baby November would be here in early afternoon.

In the last four hours my water broke on its own, the baby has moved from -1 station to +1 station, and I've dilated all the way up to 8 cm (you need to get to 10 before you start to push), getting ready to make his entrance into the world.

Right now I feel overwhelmed, but in a good way. I have more tubes and crap sticking out of me than I care to count, but I'm happy, and pain free, and I'm going to become a mama today, something I've wanted for my entire life.

I can't wait to tell Baby November how much I love him.